Like that scene in Dazed and Confused when the guy in the back of the car sorta randomly and non-sequitously says, "I gotta DANCE!" Accept that I think he says something else, but that is how I remember it, how I prefer to remember it.
That is how I am this morning.
Yesterday, I went for quite a good interview at quite a good company. The job would have made me happy. The unhappy part? It was for a permanent gig, so after a fair amount of soul searching ("where are those ethics of mine? I know I had 'em in here somewhere?") I decided to withdraw my name from their list of candidates. After all, I have a job that I am really excited about and committed to come September.
It's just the money in the meantime issue... again.
I feel like I've had this issue this entire last year. When I was in Portland, it was the same thing. I wanted to work, but couldn't commit to six months or a year. The crazy lady (and I use this term with deep respect being a crazy lady myself and all) that wanted to hire me as a manager at Target because of my personality and anthropology background "if that whole fiance, marriage thing doesn't work out", but wanted a commitment? Out of the blue, odd, and I am glad I turned it down. But then of course, temp agencies in Portland employ people sometimes. Here, it feels like there are a million people wanting temp jobs and about six to go around.
So, I am broadening my search. I am going to go around to neighborhood pubs with my CV that has zero pub-related or drink-serving related experience on it and offer myself up anyway. I am going to call my one temp agency that has gotten me some work and lower the bar for the amount of money I will accept as an hourly wage. Short of standing on a corner in a mini-skirt asking guys if they want a date or dancing around a pole, I am really opening myself up and trying to think creatively. (Do you live in London? Do you need child-care? Painting? Cleaning? Yard work done? Where is Craig's List when you need it?)
We are not desperate. Thank goodness for T. He has work and enough money coming in to keep us housed and fed. But it would be nice to visit my Mom this August in Moldova, go to the coast once, go into London to a museum? It would be nice not to be hella broke... still... again... and it would be nice if I could contribute to our household costs.
It just feels like about the fifth time in the last year that I have been looking for work/money/resources and the effort I thought it would take times 7 still doesn't cut it. Not to whine. Not to complain. Just to notice a pattern and have faith that this too shall pass.
++Author's note: as I was writing, I got a call from the temp agency for a permanent role in a school being a mentor. Agh! Why these conundrums?
No comments:
Post a Comment